Keeping Your Collar At Attention

I’ve always had sort of an unhealthy passion for button-up dress shirts. It didn’t matter to me if they were long sleeve, short sleeve, plain, striped, checkered or some fruity Hawaiian shirt; there was something magical about periodically putting each button in the designated slot from bottom to top. Every part of the shirt looked crisp and clean.

It made me feel fancy – somewhat like a king, even for a second – whenever I’m dressed in my best. Usually after a while of wearing shirts out through the washer and dryer, I noticed that the collars tended to wear-out and shrivel and curl up like those poor little bastards who traded their souls with the fat witch in the Little Mermaid. I never paid much attention to it, thinking that’s what happens to every shirt that’s worn out. My mother told me to iron them every single time I complained to her but after a while even this didn’t really solve the problem. As an FYI: I also learned never to iron the shirt collars, since it actually weakens the crease even more.

The simple cure to all this madness: collar stays. Duh. They’re absolutely ingenious! Whoever invented these simple yet mind-blowing devices should be labeled a genius and be awarded the Nobel Peace Prize, just for the fuck of it. The guy is absolutely my hero.

Collar stays are literally just a plain piece of flat plastic or metal that you slip into a pocket behind each end of the collar and they straighten it out making you look fresh and clean every time. It doesn’t even matter how many times you wash the shirt, with that collar stay right behind there, you’re all set. Some shirts already come with collar stays conveniently attached to them like the Express 1MX fitted shirts (Express is actually where I found my first pair of collar stays).

They say necessity is the mother of invention; well this has to be one of the most ground-breaking inventions ever. I was in desperate need of a way to keep my shirt from looking outdated and these collar stays came along and saved the day (and nearly my life!). And if you don’t plan on spending $50 on an Express 1MX dress shirt anytime soon, the best part is that they sell it in mass quantity at your nearest department stores like Macy’s and JC Penney. Now, all of your dress shirts can hold their own and continue to look great every time you wear them. No one wants a floppy collar.